FRIENDS AND LAUGHTER – UNINVITED HOUSE GUESTS

I have a family of raccoons living under my house and have been complaining mightly to a humerous friend on her e mail.  I recently received this solution from her.



Cute



“Since you have to deal with the raccoon's. . . why not entertain yourself! My Nana had a family of them she "supported" until Grampa got them to move on. She popped some popcorn for them, gave them a small pan of water ( like a used cake pan or aluminum pie plate) and then some sugar cubes. Well, being well mannered raccoon's, they always wash their food before eating. . . so the sugar cubes dissolved as the washed them. . soooo funny seeing them look for the cubes in the water!!! LOL!!! Then there was the popcorn. . . wet fingers made the popcorn stick to them instantly. . like sticking your tongue out and catching a piece of popcorn off your hand. . ( go ahead and try it if you never have, you'll giggle and understand how funny this will be!!) So as they are trying to deal with this, it gets caught in between their fingers and toes. . . they look so funny as they start to walk . . . giggle. . I'm telling you. . us mountain women have our on sense of fun!!!



Not so cute!



That's a true story, one I will never ever forget. My Nana was so much fun to be with and I am so happy I have her spirit in me!!”



My answer to her was,  “I don’t want to play with them, I want them to leave”.  So I bought some mothballs and spread them around where they are entering and I’m hoping that will work.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS AND LAUGHTER – NOT

Okay so I am still stressing about my looks.  It just so happens that during the last two weeks I have been given two pictures of myself and all I’ve got to say is, “UCK!!!” 

I look absolutely terrible.  Double terrible going all the way to OMG – what happened here!  So first I asked my daughter, “What’s wrong here?”  Are you surprised that I didn’t get an answer, she sort of hemmed and hawed around and I left feeling worse than before.  So then I asked Fawn and she looked at me and looked at me and looked at me.  (I could just see the wheels turning, she’s thinking to herself, “Do I tell her the truth and risk losing a friend or not?”  So finally I let her off the hook and said, “Is it my eyebrows?”  Well she jumped on that like a kid on a trike and said, “Let’s go play in my makeup!”  I was pretty sure I was in trouble then but thought that since I really needed help I was desparate!!!

I used to have really thick eyebrows (and eyelashes and hair) in fact the only thing that wasn’t thick on me THEN was my waist.  But my first pair of granny glasses rubbed on my brows and thinned them out for me.  They looked good for a while and then they started – oh well, I may as well tell you, they’re awful.  My brows consist of some black & and some white and they get really long but there isn’t many of them.  Then there’s the wee scar on my left one where no hair grows but I sure had fun getting that scar – hey, it was the 60’s, what can I say. 

I had tried eyebrow pencil before but never liked the look but I went ahead and used some of Fawn’s pencil.  And she said, “Well, that’s a start!!!”  A start!!!, I’m looking for a quick all over fix, head to toe, yeah and while I’m dreaming, lets lose a few of the pounds and a lot of the wrinkles.  THIRTY, yeah I’d like to be and look 30 again.  That would just be great for me, I’d be so happy, well maybe I’d need some more money too, maybe a lot of money and I could shop and travel and shop and go out to dinner and shop.  Well, you get the idea.

I’m still wondering why I can’t carry that bathroom mirror around with me.  LOL!

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

LAUGHTER – AGEING IS NOT FOR THE TIMID!

They say a picture is worth a thousand words but since I don’t have one let me see if I can give you a mental image of stupidity. 

Yesterday I was out sweeping my porch when a friend called and I THOUGHT I could put the phone under my chin and sweep too.  I only dropped the phone twice and each time, being the polite person that I am, I politely asked her if she was okay.  The third time the phone slipped I tried to grab for it but it has a mind of it's own and I fumbled several times trying to get hold of it.  Well I didn't!  The phone fell and somehow I got the end of the broom up my nose.

Oh go ahead a giggle, I mean how stupid can I be.  Okay, you can stop laughing now, please.

Recently a neighbor called me a witch when I was standing there with a broom in my hand.  I will forever be sorry that I didn’t stick the broom between my legs and go trotting off.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS AND LAUGHTER – DO NOT TAKE MY PICTURE

I don’t know why and it’s probably one of the great mysteries of the world that every time I leave home, I look in the bathroom mirror and my hair, makeup and clothes look just fine to me.  Then when I am out I catch a reflection of myself in a mirror or window and my jaw drops open and I think, “Oh God, I can’t really look that bad!”  but I’m afraid that I really do look like hell.  My skin washes out, you can’t even see the makeup, my hair looks like it has disappeared entirely and I look really, really BROAD.  Not just my hips, but broad all over, as in twice as big as I should look!!!

My original plan was that since I look so good in the bathroom mirror, just to take it off the wall and take it with me wherever I go.  Maybe, not such a good plan, I’m still thinking that one over.

Then I noticed that whenever someone takes a picture of me, I look the same – not the bathroom mirror same but the wide, washed out look.  I tell you it is not funny to realize that you have gotten old and wide and washed out and bald looking.  And I don’t know what to do about it.  So here’s what I’ve decided – NO MORE PICTURES! EVER!

If I hold my head up and a little tilted back to hide that saggy neck then the camera sees right up my nose and talk about stupid, really, really stupid looking.  If I try to do a pose, it looks like I’ve thrown my back out from my neck to my wazoo and further south.

I’ll have to apologize to my family for not having pictures of myself for them to look at but come to think of it, I could have been looking like this for a while and never knew it because it was always me behind the camera taking the photos of everyone else.  Now there’s an idea, I’ll just be the official photographer at every event I attend.  Yeah, that’s what I’ll do.  Just me and my mug and my bathroom mirror back there in the corner behind the camera!

And no!  I am not putting one of my mug shots in this article, you’re just going to have to use your imagination but please, be kind.


Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

LAUGHTER - JULIE ANDREWS

I ran across this recently and wanted to pass it on to you, it is soooo funny.

To commemorate her birthday, actress/vocalist, Julie Andrews made a special appearance at Manhattan Radio City Music Hall for the benefit of AARP. One of the musical numbers she performed was 'My Favorite Things' from the legendary movie 'Sound Of Music'.
Here are the lyrics she used:

(If you sing it, it’s especially hysterical)
Botox and nose drops and needles for knitting,
Walkers and handrails and new dental fittings,
Bundles of magazines tied up in string,
These are a few of my favorite things.  

Cadillac's and cataracts, hearing aids and glasses,
Polident and Fixodent and false teeth in glasses,
Pacemakers, golf carts and porches with swings,
These are a few of my favorite things.  
When the pipes leak, When the bones creak,
When the knees go bad, I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don't feel so bad.  
Hot tea and crumpets and corn pads for bunions,
No spicy hot food or food cooked with onions,
Bathrobes and heating pads and hot meals they bring,
These are a few of my favorite things...  
Back pain, confused brains and no need for sinnin',
Thin bones and fractures and hair that is thinnin',
And we won't mention our short shrunken frames,
When we remember our favorite things. 

When the joints ache, When the hips break,
When the eyes grow dim,
Then I remember the great life I've had,
And then I don't feel so bad. 
(Ms. Andrews received a standing ovation from the crowd that lasted over four minutes and repeated encores.) 
Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS – MORE TIME AT THE CAT HOUSE

Fawn recently had a chance to go away for a few days with her granddaughter and asked me to cat sit again.  “Well, okay,” I told her reluctantly.  I say reluctantly because just a few minutes earlier Paddy Paws (the hissy fitter) had come to me and rose up on my leg and allowed me to pet her.  Not five minutes later I walked by her and she hissed and slapped at me.  I clapped my hands and yelled at her and she took off like the wind.  I looked over at Fawn and she was cracking up.  I am so, so glad that she thinks this is funny.

So anyway I loaded my car and showed up at Fawn’s just in time to feed the munchkins.  I know this because they all came out (except the hissy fitter) to greet me.  Now in cat speak that means food.  I fed the little darlings and then found myself some supper and was surprised that Tuxedo Cat, commonly known as Half Pint, didn’t join me as she is the only real people food lover in the bunch.

Later that night I settled down in front of the TV and not one little body came in to keep me company.  Not even one.  However, Cat Cat did come to the door a couple of times to check if I was still there.

I noticed that whenever I fed them Cat Cat ate slower than everyone else and Poor Baby would push her away and finish her food.  So by the second night I was ready.  I fed all the cats and stood by Cat Cat’s bowl while she ate and whenever Poor Baby would come near I would step between her and the food bowl.  It only took about three tries until she got the idea that she was not going to get anything out of that bowl.

All the cats are fed on the back porch except Paddy Paws who eats later, Cat Cat who eats in the kitchen and Muffin who you have to chase down and put her bowl down whenever she decides that is the right spot to have her dinner on that night, even if it happens to be on the bed.  Yes, she gets served breakfast and dinner in bed sometimes, well actually, more often than not.

I noticed on the second day that none of the cats who used to be my best friends and followed me around the last time would only come out this time at feeding time.  But Cat Cat became my shadow and followed me to my bedroom, the kitchen, the den, the porch and wherever else I happened to be going.  And for the life of me, I don’t know why, unless it’s because I protected his food dish but on my last morning there when I took Muffin’s breakfast to the bed Cat Cat was sitting there looking expectant and so I gave him his breakfast in bed too.

My last night there I was awakened by a horrendous crash.  I sat straight up in bed with my heart pounding and listened for a long time but didn’t hear anything else so I dozed off again.  Well the next morning when I went into Fawn’s bathroom to fill their water dishes three cats ran out past me.  “Hummm!” I think and then I looked and there was the cutest little fairy in the bathtub along with all the little round soaps that fell out of her.  Oh Ho I think perhaps I have found the noise of the night.  And from the way the soaps were spread around I’m sure that they had a grand time playing with them on the slick bathtub surface.

When I told Fawn about Cat Cat following me around she asked “So when are you taking him home?”  Well as handsome as he is and as much as I enjoy him I can tell you that I changed the subject really quick! The answer is no, I still do not want a cat.  It so happens that I know a place where there are some very nice kitties that I can go and pet when I feel the need but then I can go home and leave them there so I actually really, really don’t need one of my own.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FAMILY AND FRIENDS – CAN HE REALLY BE THAT DUMB

Recently I was having a conversation with my cousin in Illinois and I had told her that I get car sick going over winding or hilly roads and I even turned green once when I rode in the motor home facing backwards.  I say once because I am a really quick learner and was sick enough to remember to never to do that again.

In reply she told me this story and I was laughing so hard that I asked if I could pass it along to you. No, I was not laughing at her being sick but at the absolute stupidity of men.

“Yes, I’ve gotten car sick when I was small & they had to let me ride up in the front seat.  When I drive I’m fine because I know when I’m going to turn. But my (male) friend just all of a sudden turns & sometimes it's not where he wanted to turn so he circles the parking lot. (Can you just see it, around and around the parking lot)  By the time he has stopped I'm green & holding my belly. 

One time after I told him that I get car sick easy, he took me over a section of town here where the roads twists & turns a lot & I asked him ‘why did we come this way?’ he said ‘well, I thought it would help you get over car sickness!’  I said ‘It makes me sick, not helps me, IT MAKES ME SICK!’ 

I finally asked him if I could drive when we went anywhere. He did for a time or two and then back to his old ways. He is 78 so there is no changing him.

Oh where, oh where have all the good men gone?.I think at our age we are better off just doing what we like & not bother with men.”

I absolutely love this and my answer to her was “What good men!”  I’ve never met one and didn’t know that they existed.  Then I gave her my favorite quote:  “Women are from Venus, men are from stupid”.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS – ALWAYS THINKING

A few days before Christmas Carole and Lynn showed up at my door with some goodies for me.  I had to save them all for Christmas but got to open one right then.  They decided that I need a Prince Charming in my life and gave me a two-foot tall FROG dressed in old English costume with the ruffles and such and holding a specter.  He came with a letter that instructed me to give him a name, introduce him to everyone who came into the house, whisper sweet nothings in his ears and kiss him every morning and every night.  He also came with another envelope that was not to be opened until Christmas. 

Not knowing exactly what would happen I made a halfhearted attempt to comply with all the rules.  I introduced him to my neighbor Liz when she came over, I patted his head a couple of times when I was near him but I never could think of a name for him, although with all the ruffles I was seriously considering calling him George, as in Boy George.

I came home from Cat’s about 4:30 Christmas day and there was “The Frog” so I gave him a quick little pat.  Then I grabbed the envelope and ripped it open only to read the following:

“Thank you for your kindness and all your efforts.  As you can see it did not work.  Maybe the time between the spell and acting upon it was too long.  This must be as disappointing to you as it is to me.  The spell was not broken as promised.  YOU did not turn into a frog as promised.”

Apparently, instead of my frog turning into Prince Charming, I was suppose to turn into a FROG.  Are you laughing?  Well, I’m NOT!  But I’m sure Carole and Lynn are still howling.



My "Good Gifts"



I opened the other gifts from Carole and Lynn and among other things was a beautiful key pendant on a chain.  Carole called me later that night to see if I had read the letter and I told her the only thing that saved her sorry soul was the necklace.

Do you have friends like this?  Would you like to borrow mine?  We can work out a trade! Or better yet, I’ll just think of a way to get even!

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FAMILY & FRIENDS – CHRISTMAS 2011

I got to spend Christmas Eve and stay overnight with Cat and her family again this year.  Boy, I would not have missed this for anything.  On Christmas Eve they get to open the gift that Charley (their 100# black lab) gets for them and this year it was a dance game for their KNEX.  Each one of them took turns dancing to the video and what a crack up.  Of course the next day there was more dancing and playing with Rob’s new Frisbee.  Cat had decided that they were going to get off of their duffs and start moving to get healthier and she certainly picked two great things for it.  Even her hubby was out of his recliner and dancing around but poor Charley has an ear infection and just laid there snoring and occasionally waking up to see what his people were doing.  We turned on the TV as soon as we got up Christmas morning because one of the channels were showing a Yule log burning in a fireplace until 10 am with Christmas music.  It was cool in their house and I kept going over to the “fireplace” and warming my hands and of course, my backside.  We managed to finish opening gifts by the time the “fire” went out and the kids went back to dancing.



It's pretty in blue too!

 Cat pickup up a set of three really cute red polka dot baking dishes and she kept one, gave me one and the last one to her mother-in-law, Linda.  Then this morning I got an emergency call from Linda.  She wanted Cat to have all three of the red polka dot dishes so she went out and the store was out of the red so she bought a set of blue polka dot dishes and came down and traded me a blue for a red in the same size.  It was nice of her to want Cat to have the entire set and to go to all the trouble to replace mine.  We visited for a while and had a nice time.

So we opened our gifts by the “fireplace”, had some wonderful hot chocolate (made my Land O Lakes, if you can find it, buy it, it’s really special) watched the family dance their little tushes off, gave Charley his treats and ate ourselves into oblivion.  What more can you ask of Christmas, lots of good food and even better company.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FAMILY & FRIENDS – MERRY CHRISTMAS

Okay, so here’s the story.  I had planned to post a lot of Christmas stories to put everyone in a warm and fuzzy mood but, as they say, life is what happens when you are busy making plans.

And on top of everything else backing up on me, half of my kitchen lights went out so I am pretty much in the dark here.  No, don’t say it, no, no, no.  Oh you just had to think it didn’t you, that I am pretty much in the dark all of the time anyway and here’s a big HO! HO! to that one. (That’s me laughing!) 

So I will get to the Christmas stories later but for right now I want to welcome aboard all the people from all the countries who follow this blog and wish all of you and yours a very

 

       Merry Christmas

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS, CHOCOLATE MOVIES AND ICE CREAM, OH YEAH!

Every now and again Carole shows up at my house with a little something to make my life brighter.  Several times she has dropped off a little fabric for my quilting or purse making.  I’m just as likely to get candy, ice cream or even a steak.  When I was sick she showed up with a supper package of soup and warm delights.

A while back she brought me dinner in a bag (I had to cook it myself), a can of green beans, a package of instant potatoes and a steak.  Then just last week Carole called and told me to meet her in the carport.  This time she brought me an entertainment package.  A bag of popcorn, 4 chocolate Dove bites, a half-gallon of spumoni ice cream and two videos.  My only disappointment was that she didn’t stay to share them with me.

She occasionally gets ticked at Alan and has to vent (and who doesn’t).  Once after they had an argument, she called and said she needed to get out and would treat me to a movie.  We never saw the movie but we did end up sitting in front of Michaels on yet another bench while she pored her heart out.  It took cruising through two stores and some frozen yogurt before she was ready to go home. Been there, done that, got the t-shirt.

That’s why I appreciate my friends so much.  Always ready to lend an ear or some chocolate and always, always be on your side because men are such twits, thankyouverymuch!

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FAMILY. DID YOU SURVIVE THANKSGIVING?

I was on my feet in the kitchen form 10 til 5:30 when we finally ate.  Thank God for my daughter's mother-in-law.  I walked in the kitchen after dinner and turned around and walked out.  Linda came in and did all the dishes and put food away.  It was a blessing.

We ate late because my daughter volunteered her family at her church.  They packed over 6500 dinners for the needy.  They packed turkey until it ran out then switched to ham, then to chicken and finally carnitas.  I guess they had volunteers running all over town picking up food donations, cooking and packing.  We tried to do this years ago but whenever we asked to help, we were told that they didn't need any more help so I'm glad she finally got the chance to do it and she did get a soft, warm fuzzy spot for thanks.

Just so you know, the best ever after Turkey day sandwich is:

Spread cream cheese on bread then spread cranberry sauce over it, put on your turkey slices and top with bean sprouts and sunflower seeds.  Yum!

Well actually the best part is the pumpkin pie for Friday's breakfast.

Fawn was grumbling because her daughter didn't make dressing for the bird, so Friday night I loaded up all the left overs from my fridge, showed up at her house and we had a feast.

Years ago, Cat made an 8x8 Thanksgiving album and every year we get two new decorated pages.  One page is for each family member to write on as to what they are thankful for.  Then we take a picture of all of us and it goes on the other page.  It is so much fun to go back over the book each year and read what people have said and see how the two grandkids have grown.

And speaking of pictures.  Did you ever notice WHEN the camera comes out. It doesn't matter where you are or the occasion they never bring that sucker out at the start when you are fresh, have on lipstick and look your best. NO! They wait until you are tired and frazzled, the lipstick is long gone, you've got foot in your teeth and a dazed look in your eye. I think that's probably why I never take a good picture.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

GIRLFRIENDS - I JUST LOVE THESE TOO FUNNY GALS!

One night a while back we had another dice game at my house, this time I served cheese and crackers with Fawn’s wonderful Jalapeno pepper jelly.  Just to get off the point a second (or two), this jelly is delicious and especially good with a smidgen over cottage cheese – any who see the recipe on the recipe page.  Okay, back to the dice game – Fawn and Margaret once again paired up against Nancy and me and were giving us a hard time.  They were saying something particularly nasty about us and Nancy looked at me and said, “Do the think we can’t hear them?”  I told her that they were old and thought they were whispering and they would probably start spelling things next.

Less than a minute later, Fawn looked at Margaret and said something about us but spelled every word, about half way through the sentence we all really looked at Margaret and saw this really blank look on her face.  So once again, we are in a fit of giggles.  Later, we all got to telling some really funny dirty jokes but I’ll just skip that.

I should tell you that my dining room set is only seven years old and that explains why I haven’t had the time to take the plastic off of the seats yet, well that and the fact that they are upholstered in white.  Now I’m kinda thinking about not taking the plastic off because sometimes when you sit down it sounds a whole lot like a whoopee cushion and is good for some chuckles.  What can I tell you, you gotta get your laughs anywhere you can.

We were chatting about “special talents” and I told them how my sister could raise just one eyebrow and I had tried many times but it just wasn’t happening for me.  So Fawn, the brat, easily raised just one eyebrow and the rest of us spent several funny minutes trying to raise just one of our brows.  Fawn won that one, hands down.  She can whistle too and that really impresses me.  I have tried and tried to whistle but I just get a sick little windy sound.  What I would really like to learn is that sharp piercing whistle where you put two fingers in your mouth, well anyway I was never that great at blowing bubbles either.

Fawn called this morning and we were laughing about her spelling again when I finally fessed up and told her that when she first started spelling, I wasn’t getting it either and about half way through I finally caught on that she wasn’t speaking Greek.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS – OH MAN, I WANT ONE OF THOSE!

When I moved in the park I met Tanya at Crafty Ladies and she also comes to Ladies Bunco.  Tanya is from Cuba and has a lot of those old world values and ideas.  Her husband, who was older than her, passed away a few years ago and Tanya stayed in full mourning for a year wearing her dark clothes.  Shortly after she lightened up her wardrobe she started getting out more and her sense of humor really clicked in.  Tanya is one of the most fun people to be around, she cooks like a dream and has a heart as big as all outdoors.

Not too long ago I noticed Tanya wearing a Jewish Star on a chain around her neck and I asked her, “Tanya, I thought you were Catholic”?  She said, “I am” and pulled out her cross from under her blouse.  I laughed and told her that she was just like Elvis, trying to cover all of her bases, “Just in Case”.

Recently Tanya bought a trike.  For you younger people, a trike is a full size bicycle but with two wheels in the back.  Now she didn’t get just any trike.  No, not our Tanya!  Her trike is pink with a chrome basket in the back, a pink basket in the front and a surrey type covering over it because as Tanya explained “I am not a sun worshiper”.  It is the cutest darn thing I’ve ever seen.  I think that maybe I need one too, maybe in red or purple or….

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS AND LAUGHTER – OTIS THE WEINER VAMPIRE LIZARD

And then on Halloween night, just about dark there came a loud knocking on my door.  When I opened it there stood Carole and Alan and Otis.  Alan handed me a baggie with three cookies in it and told me that they were reverse Trick or Treating.  Oh goodies!  Yum!

Then Carole said, “I know how you hate lizards so I brought you one” and there stood Otis in his lizard costume that Carole had made.  I thought I was going to have to lay down on the floor to get a good picture of Otis but then decided that since it was Sunday and late at night the crane people would charge double or triple to get me back up again so Carole helped Otis pose for me and I leaned way over and took these shots. 

Carole who makes all the costumes wasn’t wearing one but Alan came dressed as a ???, I don’t know how that relates to a weiner lizard but it was sure fun and I really enjoyed the laughter.  Well, just see for yourself, presenting Otis The Weiner lizard!

Well here it is Halloween again and at around 10 this morning Carole came a knocking on my door.  She shouts out “Happy Reverse Trick or Treat!”  and hands me three bags of candy and cookies.  Yummy!  Seems like Carole and Lynn are out and about on Lynn’s golf cart delivering goodies.  Well, that and showing off Otis the Vampire Weiner Dog.  I’m not sure he looks like a vampire, maybe more like a bat and he sure doesn’t look very happy but that’s okay, Mama is very happy and just so you know, Carole makes all Otis’s costumes as well as her grandkids too.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS AND LAUGHTER – THE CAT IN THE HAT’S BOO BERRY BREAKFAST!

October was so much fun last year.  Every month our park has a breakfast and of course being October Carole decided that this morning’s breakfast would have a Halloween theme.  We had Boo Berry muffins, Ghost Toast and, well you get the idea.  Carole decided that if you came in costume you got a treat.  No, I didn’t go in costume and neither did Bea but we sat at a table with Lynn, Ken and Mickie who each had a colored hankie with a face pinned on their shirts.  Ken took his off so when Carole came around giving out treats for costumes I grabbed Ken’s scarf and said, “Look I’ve got a costume and then Bea grabbed it from me and said, “Me too!”  So our whole table got the treats.  Did you ever think that you would hear of a bunch of elderlys pulling a stunt like this?  Well, just wait until I tell you what the treat was that we were all pulling this nonsense to get.  We each got a pair of plastic wind up false teeth so of course, we sat there and wound them up and played with them.  Hey, you gotta get your laughs any where you can! 

Carole even managed to create a costume that has a hat.  So here she is:  the cat in the hat in all her finery. Notice the tail, she swished her tail all over breakfast.  I really have to hand it to her husband Alan because he gets right into the spirit of thing with her.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FAMILY – IT’S MY BABY’S BIRTHDAY

Every year on Cat’s birthday I spend the day thinking about the day she was born and a lot of time thinking about her as a baby, a toddler, a kid, a teenager, a young woman, an adult, a wife and a mother.  Yep, I pretty much relive her whole life on this day and since I was there it’s a flashback of my life too. We have been together for each of our birthdays through her life and I thought we were going to miss last year.  Well, let me tell you what happened.

Cat had her gall bladder removed a couple of years ago and her stomach has been bothering her ever since so Friday she went in for an upper GI (yucky!) and they removed a lot of polyps from (we aren’t quite sure where) her stomach, intestines, somewhere down there.  They put her on a bland soft food diet for a week and NO CHOCOLATE FOR TWO WEEKS!  Well, this pretty much shot any Happy Birthday Celebration we could have.

 I talked to Cat the evening before her birthday and she absolutely, positively, no way wanted to do anything for her birthday, she wanted to wait a couple of weeks and then celebrate.  When I got up that morning I was going to go over there with some birthday pudding or birthday yogurt or birthday applesauce but then I decided that if she didn’t want to do anything I should really honor her wishes.  Bummer!

8:30 on her birthday morning Cat calls and tells me that a friend is taking her out for tea and that was enough to put her in a good enough mood to ask me for over dinner that night.  “How much yogurt are we going to eat?”  I asked.  But she said we are carbing out with April’s Alfredo Sauce over Noodles, Inger’s Yummy Potatoes and orange or lemon cake.  Sounds good to me, I’ll be there at 6, home rubbing my tummy by 8 and happy because once again that we got to spend part of her birthday together.

Both of these dishes are especially good, we call the Alfredo Sauce “Heart Attack On A Plate” because it is so rich.  You can find both on the recipe page.

For Cat’s birthday this year, she had a Girl Scout thing going in the afternoon and Ray wasn’t feeling well so I had just Cat and the kids over for a birthday dinner.  We had been at Kohl’s a few days before and I found a book titled “I’ll Always Love You”.  It is a special little book and one of the lines in it is that whether you are a baby or a grown adult, I’ll always love you.  So of course I had to get this for Cat and I attempted eggplant parmagana with spaghetti and salad.  (It came out really good) and I made our favorite birthday cake; spice cake with bunches of milk chocolate frosting.  Good thing that we pigged out because a couple of days later she found out that both her and Ray have diabetes. 

Anyway, we had a fun evening.  Rob and Mags were chatting back and forth so we couldn’t get a word in edgewise.  BUT that’s a good thing because they are four years apart and it has taken until the last couple of years for them to finally stop fighting and become friends.

Just for fun, please leave a comment wishing Cat a Happy Birthday and I’ll make sure she sees it.  While you are at it Ray’s birthday is next week.

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS – FAWN’S FUNNY VACATION

While I was house and cat sitting for Fawn, she was in Missouri for her 60^th. high school reunion.  Yes you read it right – her SIXTIETH reunion.  This was a memorable trip for her because she felt like it might be the last time that she got to see these people and places where she grew up so she spent a lot of time traveling around talking to people and seeing places.

At first she told me that she got a ticket and she guessed she deserved it for going 80 mph.  When the rest of the story came out slightly different.  Yes, she was doing 80 and at times that darn rental car would creep up toward 85 or 90 and she would ease back.  But she got the ticket because a car pulled in behind her and she thought, “Well this guy wants to get around me so I had better speed up and pass all of these cars”.  You see Fawn hadn’t been in Missouri for years she didn’t recognize that is was a Highway Patrol officer. 

When she finally realized her mistake and pulled over she was laughing and told the officer what she had done.  He laughed too but still gave her a whopping ticket.

Miss Innocent!

How was Fawn’s trip?  Well Fawn had an all around good time because she got to see old friends and meet some new ones, visit her old homeland and she even got pinched on the butt at the reunion.  She says she also got $133.00 worth of fun (the price of the ticket) just telling people about her escapade!  I’d say she had a great time!

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FAMILY – GONE SHOPPING – GONE NUTS

A couple of weeks ago I met Cat at Kohls because we needed to do some bra shopping.  Buying bras is a chore for both of us and we have to try on dozens of the suckers because we are so hard to fit.  You think I’m kidding, we walked in Kohls at 10:30 and out around 3:00.

We had just got there and were standing in the bra department when Cat looks over at me and says, “Mom, do you have to go pee?”  I answered with my usual “What!” and a mom look.  Cat says that she has a funny story for me and wanted to make sure I could stand still for the whole thing.  So I told her, no, I didn’t have to pee and to go ahead and tell me.

It seems like that morning she had a houseful of kids (not unusual, that house seems to attract stray kids) and she had taken Charley outside to walk up and down the sidewalk while she was on her cell phone.

Apparently they did enough walking that Charley decided to squat and do his business in a neighbor’s yard about 4 or 5 houses down the street.  Cat saw what he was doing and was horrified.  She told Charley “You are a 100 pound Lab, you are not a Chawawa (spell check says “What!”)  and you will hold it until we get home.  She turned him around and started home talking to him all the way.  She said that Charley was almost walking on his tiptoes trying to hold it in until they got home.  My humorous daughter even demonstrated how Charley was tipping down the sidewalk.   Yahoo!  They made it and so did I (to the bathroom).

Well by this time we are hanging onto the bra racks laughing so hard that we’re crying.  We had everyone in that part of the store looking at us like we were nuts. 

I was telling the girls at craft class about this and one of them said, “He must be really afraid of her”.  They don’t get it, Cat is Charley’s mama, and he dearly loves her and would do anything she asked of him. 

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!

FRIENDS AND LAUGHTER – TOO FUNNY HOT DICE GAME

Margaret and I started playing this crazy dice game, 500, several years ago.  Then a couple of months ago her daughter Nancy (a different Nancy) and Fawn joined us.  We started taking turns and on this Saturday night it was my turn to host.  I made a huge salad, heated some bread and had a German chocolate cake for dessert.  (Or is that desert?)  You know spell check doesn’t catch everything.  Anyway, we pigged out, carried out the dishes and sat down to a night of fun.

We were talking about marriage and Fawn looked over at Margaret and asked her who Nancy’s father was.  Absolutely deadpan, Margaret replies, “Hell, I don’t know”.





In 500 you don’t have partners, it’s every gal for herself but it soon became apparent very shortly that the two old gals were pairing off and rooting for me and Nancy to lose.  At one point, Nancy was rolling and I looked up and Fawn and Margaret both had the evilest look on their faces and they were doing the thing with their fingers, trying to hex the dice.  I elbowed Nancy to look at them and then I said, “Hey you guys better practice your aim, I’m getting a terrible case of crotch twitch!”  And at that point, we all just fell over laughing and two of us had to leave the table to go wee.  What more can you ask for than a great night of fun and laughter with good friends.

If any of you gals out there play 500, let me know and if you want to know how to play, just ask and I’ll be happy to tell you. 

Wishing you Joy and Laughter Everyday!